Improve Your Relationships By Behaving Like a Grown-up

If people treated each other as equals and behaved like adults in their relationships, a lot of relationship problems would be so much easier to solve. Don’t get discouraged if you recognize that you and or your partner do not always behave maturely when dealing with each other. In many ways our relationships provide us with excellent growth opportunities.

Emotional maturity means that we take control of our emotions, rather that letting our emotions run us. Emotional intelligence is an important part of creating a healthy and lasting relationship. Increasing our emotional maturity can help us in many ways. It will reduce the stress we feel in our relationships, it will help us to be healthier physically and emotional and it will improve the quality and success of our relationships and our life.

Signs of emotional maturity:
• Awareness of your own needs and wants
• Secure sense of self
• Ability to be vulnerable and give and receive love
• Willingness to sacrifice for others
• Empathy for others
• Impulse control (thinking before acting)
• Willingness to be accountable for your own actions, words and thoughts
• Willing to face problems and seek solutions
• Enjoys life, takes a positive approach and learns from mistakes
• Lives with integrity (being true to our values)
• Ability to handle difficult situations
• Solution rather than blame oriented
• Hard on problems and easy on people
• Ability to wait patiently and defer gratification

Becoming emotionally mature is a life-long process. Here are some ideas for improving emotional maturity:
1. Get to know and love yourself
2. Experiment with daily acts of kindness
3. Learn to cooperate rather than control
4. Find a mentor or a good example to follow
5. Find a cause; commit to something bigger than yourself

The benefits of improving our emotional maturity will show up in our relationship with our self, with our loved ones and with the world. Life will be more peaceful, enjoyable and fulfilling.

Susan Derry, B.Ed., M.S.Psy., R.P.C.
Professional Counselor & Life Coach

Co-author of Marriage Prep: Beginnings a downloadable marriage preparation course

Co-author of Intimate Sex: Manual for Lovemaking, a sex manual for couples

Offers a free Nurturing Marriage Ezine