Be True To Yourself

Dr. Suess gave us this pearl of wisdom, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”

Being true to yourself means guarding your integrity. Integrity is an essential part of self-esteem. The cost to your self-respect is huge when you pretend to be someone that you are not in order to gain acceptance from others. The thing that people often forget is that self-acceptance is far more important than popularity.

Pretending to be someone other than who you are in order to fit in will, in the long run, cause you to reject who you really are. The problem is that when you are unable to love and accept yourself, you will struggle with loving and accepting others.

When your actions run contrary to your values and beliefs you will experience discord in your life. Things will not feel “right” to you. It may feel like you are struggling against life.

Being true to yourself begins with knowing yourself. Like Julia Roberts in Runaway Bride, you need to pay attention to your own feelings. What kind of eggs do you like? Get to know yourself.

Recognize that your real friends will not push you to do things that are against your values and they will accept you as you are. Friends also help you see yourself more clearly at times. A true friend will not only accepts and loves you, but helps you grow as well.

Being true to yourself and accepting yourself does not mean that you are perfect and never need to grow or change. Self-acceptance does not mean self-coddling. If you have faults, work to improve in those areas. If you make a mistake, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, apologize and learn from it.

Being true to yourself also does not require you to be disrespectful or inconsiderate of others. But it does mean that you make your own choices based on your beliefs and values and that you honor your inner sense of what is right for you.


Susan Derry, B.Ed., M.S.Psy., R.P.C.
Professional Counselor & Life Coach

Co-author of Marriage Prep: Beginnings a downloadable marriage preparation course

Co-author of Intimate Sex: Manual for Lovemaking, a sex manual for couples

Offers a free Nurturing Marriage Ezine