Make Plans, Not Mistakes

In any relationship there needs to be a vision, a place where you want the relationship to be. In business this is called a mission statement, in travelling this is called a road map. If there is no destination then there is no knowing when you arrive.

The vision that you glorify in your mind, the ideal that you enthrone in your heart - this you will build your life by, and this you will become." James Lane Allen

A vision of what you would like your relationship to be is important because if you don't know and are confused by what an ideal relationship is that is what your subconscious mind will attempt to produce for you. As you engage each other in life, if there is no clearly defined vision then there are no clearly defined expectations. Expectations are important in a relationship because people instinctively try to live up to expectations, especially those held by the significant people in their lives.

All have heard the truism, if you fail to plan you plan to fail, well it is just as applicable here as anywhere. A vision statement of your relationship, with clearly defined roles and expectations, allows you to concentrate on the important things in life instead of always drifting with the current. Important things like spending quality time with family and friends instead of time frivoled away. Knowing where you are going is the first step to knowing how to get there and provides the motivating force necessary to move us on that chosen path.

Take some time and invest in your relationship and your future; dream big, decide early, create the plan, chose the road and do whatever it takes to define a successful relationship for you. Otherwise the world will do it for you and with the shape the world is in today that is a scary thought.

Dallas Munkholm
Professional Counselor & Life Coach

Co-author of Marriage Prep: Beginnings a downloadable marriage preparation course.

Co-author of Intimate Sex: Manual for Lovemaking, a sex manual for couples

Offers a free Nurturing Marriage Ezine