Relationships: Avoid Criticism

For most people it is much easier to confess the faults of others that to admit to their own.

When we make a habit of finding fault with our family and friends, we will limit their ability to share themselves with us. It is not pleasant to share your thoughts and feelings with someone who feels the need to point out every flaw. People who are overly critical of others often find themselves bitter and lonely. Others simply do not enjoy being around them and often choose to stay away.

We may claim as Marie on Everybody Loves Raymond, that we criticize out of love, however the result will be the same. Relationships will be strained and eventually disintegrate. Make it your motto to only offer advice to those who ask. Choose to focus on what others are doing right, rather than on what they are doing wrong.

A Dutch Proverb said it best: “Our faults irritate us most when we see them in others.” The next time you feel the urge to criticize someone else, stop and take a close look within. Then smile and find something nice to say.

Susan Derry, B.Ed., M.S.Psy., R.P.C.
Professional Counselor & Life Coach

Co-author of Marriage Prep: Beginnings a downloadable marriage preparation course

Co-author of Intimate Sex: Manual for Lovemaking, a sex manual for couples

Offers a free Nurturing Marriage Ezine