Relationship Algebra

A good relationship is like an algebra equation. Both sides of the equation must be equal. An example would be:

Love + Integrity = Honesty + Trust

How does this work? If you have a strong sense of personal integrity, which you honor, and you love your partner within the bounds of that integrity you will receive trust in turn from your partner. She or he will trust you with their love, their intimate secrets and dreams. They know and feel your love for them and understand the depth of commitment your integrity allows you to forge. This fact alone allows them to be honest with you.

Honesty is not just being verbally truthful, not telling lies and not leaving things out, although that is a very important part of being honest. Honesty is also about giving your all to the relationship, not holding back waiting for the next bad thing to happen. It is about being there in the bad times and the good times. It is sharing both of those with the one you love.

Being honest means that you don’t sugar coat things to make them more palatable. You face up to your own fears and anxieties. You accept the responsibility of meeting your own needs and assisting your partner do the same. It means saying the hard things and doing the tough things when needed.

In any relationship it is all about balance and feeling equal. You want to have a happy successful relationship; do the math.

“A man content to go to heaven alone will never go to heaven.” Boethius

Dallas Munkholm, B.A., B.Com., R.P.C.
Professional Counselor & Life Coach

Co-author of Marriage Prep: Beginnings a downloadable marriage preparation course

Co-author of Intimate Sex: Manual for Lovemaking, a sex manual for couples

Offers a free Nurturing Marriage Ezine